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The english language has more than enough nuances to make communication difficult, but sometime we add to the complexity in the way in which we express ourselves.

I had a trip to europe recently. The trip went great, but the journey back was really challenging. The Brits must be as frustrated as the rest of us about traffic works and the hold-ups they create. On one sign someone had added an exclamation point to a sign that read

End Road Works

After an hour to get passed one hold up I was ready to add a few more choice phrases to that person’s protest.

At the airport I wanted something to eat. No problem, there’s plenty of restaurants. My problems started when I went to the restrooms (and wipe that grin off your face now). There was a sign,

Employees must wash hands.

It seemed fair enough, but do you have any idea how long it took me to get an employee to comply? Despite the establishments warning and its concern for the hygiene of its customers, it’s not easy to get them to follow their own instructions. It took a good thirty minutes and an argument with the manager before he finally washed my hands.

This left me late for my flight. The departure level was one floor up, so naturally I found the escalator, only to find a sign that read

Dogs must be carried on the escalator.

First hand-washing and now this? Who in the ding-dong takes their dog to the airport with them just so they can ride on an escalator? I don’t even have a dog!

On the way to the stairs I passed a pharmacy. I was a little tense, so I called in as asked

Do you have anything for a headache?

The last thing I expected was to be smacked over the head with a stick, but in all honesty it did leave me with a headache.

When I finally walking through security one of the guards dropped by bag and the contents rolled all over the floor. The guard picked up my bag, but not the contents. As he handed it back to me, I scrabbled to retrieve my possessions, and thanked him in the most sarcastic manner I could manage. Now, either he missed the tone of my voice or he’s had years more practice at sarcasm than me, because his snap reply was the perfect truth.

It was the least I could do.

As you might have guessed, I was first in line for a drink when the plane took off.

Seen any signs that bug you lately?



(Image courtesy of Signs Shipped)


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