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I’m pretty sure it was the Chrysler Turboflite that gave birth to the expression “What were they thinking?” Have you ever seen such unrestrained ugliness? The picture above makes it look like a table top with headlights and the latest in Lazy Susan’s. But that single picture doesn’t do justice to the designers “art.”

There you go. Shocking, isn’t it? The jacked up canopy, the open front wheels and that spoiler.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. Maybe it looked better in color. Well, you tell me.

Even parquet flooring, a nice bit of curtain and a spotlight can’t distract your eye from those front wheels and that laughable radiator grille. And can you imagine how dangerous those front wheels would be? Maybe they planned this thing for an amphibious life. I can certainly think of things I would do with 20,000ft of water and this thing.

Even the “subtle” touches on this car were bizarre. For example, take a look at the rear view.

Do you see those exhaust pipes? Is there anything more corny and ugly that trying to thread the exhaust pipe of a car though the rear bumper? I saw the same sort of effect on a BMW recently. Of course, that had the whole Bangled look to it in the hope that you would notice the rectangular exhaust pipes, and I must say, it was a ploy that nearly worked.

And take a good look inside the Turboflite. At the base of the center console there appears to be an enormous dial of some sort. I suspect its a barometer, though quite why you’d want it by your feet beats me. Maybe they thought it added a touch of class.

There’s one final oddity about this car. Take a look at the pictures below. Look carefully. Can you spot the difference?

Do you see it? The amazing thing is … the tires in the second picture are WHITE. They not only changed the tires, but chose a different color as well. Can you imagine being at the meeting where someone actually decided that white tires were what this thing needed to really set it off? Someone actually spent time thinking about it. And it wasn’t like it’d done 50,000 miles and needed a new set. No, no, no. This was a concept car, a show car, it never went anywhere. They took off a perfectly serviceable set of black tires and fitted shiny new white tires because they thought it would LOOK BETTER. I can’t stop laughing at the idea that the bunch at the white tire meeting must have spent time stood around this monstrosity congratulating themselves on their sense of style.

But that’s my (jaundiced) opinion. Let loose on the beauty of white tires. Tell me how I fail to see the amazing utility of the jacked up canopy for keeping families dry in rainy old Seattle. Or fill me in on what that curious dial at the bottom of the center console might have been. Please.

Cheers

 

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